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Friday, February 22, 2013

Obama for Pope!

(By Alaa Hegazi.)
This just seems the obvious choice.  Barack Obama will have his ring kissed on a regular basis.  He'll look good in papal vestments.  His voice will resonate across St. Peter's Square.  He'll have a lock on the Sunday morning youth vote. 

No term limits.  Golf courses across Christendom ready and waiting.  And Pope Pius XIII (lucky number 13) will never have to write a budget or a piece of legislation, ever again.  (Well, I'm not entirely sure that he ever has, so that might not be such a big adjustment.)  Plus, he can go on running against Republicans (just substitute the words "the Devil," and keep campaigning as he always has) to his heart's delight. 

Obama isn't qualified?  Nonsense.  He's certainly as qualified to be pope, as he was to be president, or win the Nobel Peace Prize. 

He's not Catholic?  Details, schmetails.  If he could befriend Jeremiah Wright for mutual political advantage for so many years, why should he have any problem with the assembled cardinals and archbishops? 

1 comment:

BenYachov said...

Actually to be serious for a moment.

The election of an objective heretic to the Papacy would be invalid by definition.*

Not that any of the Cardinals even the African ones would realistically vote for him anyway.

*all non-Catholics are by definition "heretics" in some manner or another.

Cheers.